Fan Guide 101 or: How you can start winning and stop being a little bitch
After a quick twitter search to check the pulse of Canuck Nation after this loss, one thing’s clear.. our fans are still fucktards.
Canucks First Place in the Entire NHL!
With their win over the Colorado Avalanche on Sunday, the Canucks moved into first place in the entire NHL. What does this mean exactly? Well, unless they start awarding Stanley Cups in January, not a whole heck of a lot. Even being at the top of the standings at the end of the season usually means squat given that the President’s trophy winners have only won the cup five times in the last 20 years. But you can excuse Canucks fans for getting a little giddy right now. After all, being at the top of the league’s standings near the midway point of the season has been a rarity during this team’s 40 year history.
Vancouver Canucks Fans = 5th Most Annoying in Sports
If you’ve been reading from the start, you’ll know that I don’t disagree at all (except for the part about the Sedins whom I heart just fine)! Stop being douchebags, Canucks fans! Stop freaking out over a “poor” 3 game start to the season. NEVER EVER plan a Stanley Cup parade after the 1st round again! Etc.. Sheesh.
What's Wrong With this Team?
They’re 0-3 and in less than one week have gone from cup contenders to talentless bums (according to the bandwagon douchebags anyways). Well, the fact of the matter is that this team isn’t as good as those early season predictions (loyal Canuckz.com readers already knew this after reading this post) and they’re not as bad as their 0-3 record suggests.
Lets Get Some Love for Demitra
That’s right, I said it. Pavol Demitra revealed on Tuesday that he will likely miss another six weeks with a shoulder injury and what ensued was what can be described as mild jubilation on sports talk radio and message boards. Demitra has been described as too soft and too streaky, and many are suggesting that the Canucks would be better off without him.
Canucks Reportedly Re-Sign Luongo
According to Sportsnet, the Canucks have re-signed franchise player and team captain Roberto Luongo. Apparently the term and salary have been agreed upon, so only minor details remain to be worked out. This shouldn’t come as a surprise to Canucks fans, but it’s definitely great news. Remember all those bandwagon douchebags calling for the Canucks to trade Luongo after the Canucks were bounced in the 2nd round by Chicago? Luckily Mike Gillis isn’t smoking the same thing they were, and realizes the value of a top goalie.
Luongo To Sign Extension Soon?
Reports are circulating that Luongo is about to sign a six year deal worth over $6.5 million per season.
Nazzy Speaks! Jersey Retirement Next?
Good article in the Province this weekend about about Markus Naslund. For the first time since his retirement, Naslund spoke candidly to Province reporter Jim Jamieson about life after hockey. This of course means that the debate of whether or not to hang his #19 from the rafters of GM Place has heated up. When asked about it, Naslund said “It’s very flattering. If you ask any athlete, to have your number retired is one of the most flattering things you can have happen. It would be a great honour”. Typical response from a guy who has been a class act throughout his whole career.
Plan the Stanley Cup Parade Route! Really?!
I figure this would be the perfect 1st post.. add this to the long list of reasons why Canucks fans/media in general are total douchebag bandwagoners! The Province wants you to send in your Stanley Cup Parade Route! Really?! Seriously!?
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